Week after week I watch and listen to men share their procrastinations, complaints, challenges and broken promises to themselves AND do little that actually changes their situation, their reality.  And this time I am angrier than ever.  But what I am really angry at is that there is no Universal Tit, and falsely believing in the BIG TIT has prevented me from making big changes in my reality!

I thought this group was different

I thought perhaps this men’s group would be different — that they would make big changes; want men to remind them when they were not making the changes they wanted; want men to tell them where they were lying to themselves; and want to have other men point out where their bullshit lay, where they fooled themselves.

Nope – not happening anywhere near the level I thought it would.  This is not new — for decades I have sat in dozens of groups where many people did not make changes in their reality even though they did their personal work.

But dammit, this is a New Warrior iGroup!  The intention of these iGroups, created and supported through Mankind Project, is to have men be supported to live their mission to make the world a better place.  Not this group — some men do not even have missions.  And those that do, speak with little conviction and passion about their mission.

I am angry because it is all up to me

Why am I really angry?  Because I, Me, Moi, Yo NEED to make big changes in my life, but I am not getting the help I thought I would get.  Once again it is up to ME to change my reality, all up to ME with little help.

Am I alone?

Don’t any of you get angry when you do not get the help you need to make a change in your life?  Or when you realize it is ALL up to you to make the really important changes?  Or when you seek help you need to make a big change, but are let down by your therapist, group, friend, personal development seminar facilitator, family, significant other, community?

WOW — have I been let down!  But more from myself than anyone or anything else.

OK – so if I accept that I will not get all the help I need to make a big change, then what?  I still resist that it is all up to me to make big changes.  Really — I want to believe someone or something will help me to make changes.  To be led.  To be supported.  To be nurtured.  To be held when I hurt.

Where is my Universal Tit to suck on?

Universal Tit

If I accept that I am not getting my universal TIT, then I am left with a mountain of pain to make big changes in my life. Where is my BIG TIT to save me? Mommy???

What I really want is a grand archetypal universal mother to help me make big changes- to be awesome — in effect a UNIVERSAL TIT.

Don’t I get saved from the pain?  Don’t I deserve my TIT?  Don’t we all get one?  I want mine!  Where is mine?  WHERE IS IT???

Dammit, I believe I have a right to my archetypal awesome GRAND TIT to suck on.  Hell, if I was woo-woo, I would say I am waiting for Great Spirit to help, guide me, love me.  Oh wait, if I was woo-woo then I would believe I already have it and all I have to do is accept it.  Gag me with a spoon, make me puke.

If I accept that I am not getting my BIG TIT, then I am left with a mountain of pain to make big changes in my life.  Where is my BIG TIT to save me?  Mommy???

I despise the woo-woo

One reason I despise woo-woo people is that they often do little of what they are capable of doing to make their lives better.  They think everything will be OK and just work out, because some universal force takes care of them.

Most woo-woo people’s lives would be MUCH better if they took action, instead of solely relying on their magical thinking that all will being taken care of without taking action.  And people around them would be better if they took more action to change their personal reality.

I get why I am angry at them — I project my disgust at an underground belief (hidden) that I should have this universal Tit, and angry that I don’t have it.  See how projection works?  I am angry at the me I see in them, angry at my belief that I see in them.  Woo-woo people just remind me of my belief that I despise.

Who else wants this Universal TIT?

Who out there believes that they should also have this universal tit?  Who is waiting for it?  Trying to get it from others, other groups and organizations?

All right, so I need to accept NO TIT for me.  And I won’t get my universal TIT from women.

Hey, maybe, just maybe the American fascination with tits is just a massive projection of men wanting the universal TIT?  Do ya think???

Yes I am being snarky here as I resist the fact that there is no TIT to nurture me.  If I give up this fantasy then I have to do all the work to make changes.  I will HAVE TO CHANGE my actions and feel the growth pains in the process.

Yuck, this sucks that I don’t get to “suck”!

Men’s group and the BIG TIT

Don’t get me wrong.  I am still angry about this men’s group doing little to support a big shift (versus mere incremental changes) in each man’s situation — their reality.

I wonder if any other men in my group falsely believe in this universal TIT and that it will support them to make changes?  And in believing in the TIT, that they continue to not take matters into their own hands, not making big changes in their personal reality.

Do I have a right to disillusion others about NO Tit for you?

A deep inquiry of mine is — Do I have a right to point out to anyone that they do little to change their personal reality?  Or that they live a fraction of their potential because they do not change their reality in any big way?  And they are not going to get their UNIVERSAL TIT?

In case I still am not clear here

What if you are not making big changes in your life because you are waiting for something or someone to save you, nurture you, support you to make the big changes?

Stop waiting.  NO Tit for you!