Talyaacontinues her recovery, receiving gargantuan love from me and your online heart messages.
Going through brain surgery that threatens brain function and life itself, ending in an 11 inch scar with over 80 staples is an intimate event. My beloved Talyaa and I continue to deepen our connection and love. Just when I think we can not grow any closer, we do. I never knew love could go so deep and continue to grow!
INTIMACY WITH CANCER
Throughout our 3 year journey with cancer, we have faced many intimate situations – everything from sitting with my beloved as she did her coffee enemas because I didn’t want to be apart from her, to giving her IV’s, to signing a Power of Attorney and Living Will in the hospital because we thought she might die, to being present to her first seizure.
And of course, having to care for Talyaa at times when even sitting up took too much energy so for 3 weeks I had to bring everything to her and help her go to the bathroom. I hate that we have suffered, yet our intimacy has only grown.
And the passion – OMG! Even though cancer has debilitated Talyaa’s libido, her heart wants me deeply. I want to make love with her more than when we first met or those first few months of rabid daily sex making. Whoever believes passion dies with marriage or over time is sorely mistaken.
All I can see is beauty with my beloved. Her new 11 inch incision with over 80 staples on her head from her craniotomy is beautiful – I look at it with fascination, feel admiration for the surgeon’s skill and talk to it with love as I do my kitty.
GROW BIG LOVE
We hope to give back by sharing our story – because our story is about way more than cancer – it is about how we keep growing love – big love. We want our story to inspire you to love more!
CAREGIVER NEEDS HELP
Well, my back gave out this morning where I am lying down, only able to crawl and stand up for brief moments. Talyaa had to get me food. As I am supposed to be caring for my beloved, I feel horrible as I am the one that needs some help. Luckily Talyaa is able to get up and do a few things. Our journey through cancer has included my own intense debilitation and work to heal. I believe I fail Talyaa when I need so much help.